Wednesday, December 17, 2014

End of Year

I haven't really had that much to say oddly. I've been going through some things. Not bad, but definitely needed. I've come face to face with some reasons behind certain behaviors that I have and now I'm in the self healing stage. Should I be seeing a shrink? Maybe lol I think that's subjective. I find that the power of prayer and will power, me actually wanting to get better, move on from these feelings and situations that I find myself in, has really truly helped the process.

What I'm learning is to let go. Not of situations and people, though that's always helpful, but more so let go of the expectations and the hurt.

I've found that as I've built a stronger relationship with God, the enemy's tests are more frequent. I'm attacked almost daily in the craziest ways. I'm glad to be able to identify my weaknesses but sometimes, I honestly feel like ignorance is bliss. But without knowledge, I wouldn't experience this growth, so I'm embracing and learning.

Though I have hurt feelings and a bruised heart/soul, I can't stay being the victim. I have to press on and take responsibility for the behaviors that I keep myself in. If I'm tired of it, I need to get rid of it. Time to start being fair to myself.

That's what 25 is about? Right?

-Blah, I'm just rambling. I felt like I owed you a blog post but I really haven't had much to share. I just want to be happy and share that happiness with everyone around me. I want to make someone happy. Like a man. Like my man. What I'm saying is I want to be married? See. I have no clue where this is even going. I think I just need to stay off facebook because everyone is getting engaged or having babies.


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