.withholding sex in relationships has been an experience. you see men come and go just as fast as they came. it's funny because i'll tell the guy straight up, i'm not having sex with you ANY time soon. like a while, and he disappears like 3 days after the conversation if not the very next day. but then there are some that stay. but the uncertainty that i'm facing, is are they staying because they are interested in pursuing me or are they going to put me in the friend category. i have no problem being a friend, but what if i'm digging you. i ultimately want respect and some guys give respect by sticking to being friends, but i don't want that. I was talking to a friend and he was telling me that though sex is 20% out of 100%, it's a big 20%. so where do i lie if i'm only giving you 80%. am i just a homie? i get that men enjoy sex and can often have sex with no strings attached, but i don't want to drive the guy into another bed, or drive him to bring someone into his bed because i don't want to give him any. but if that's the case, then he wasn't that important to pursue.
it's all weird. these thoughts were sparked up by a conversation i was having when asked if i would be a shorty/homegirl. i'm not confused by what my role is in that relationship no, but i do know that they are two different things. a shorty has a bit more over the homegirl who leans heavily towards the "just friends" side.
also, can you keep the feelings that you've had for a once physical relationship towards that person. is it true that those passionate feelings can still burn for that person if the physical is out? of course physical isn't everything, but to men it may be a lot.