Tuesday, September 28, 2010

.round and round we go.

.this weekend i drove home to NJ on a SUPER spontaneous thing to see a friend* (rolls eye) who i really care about. all the roads leading up to this past weekend have been good. no arguments, no uncertainties. just good. and then we realized that we are back on that track.

`progress is so certain. baby steps. i don't understand why progress is feared. i feel like i'm the most understanding person. apparently that doesn't really matter much. but it's been strecthed out.

these college years are the most fun yet annoying. i'm just annoyed. i can't wait for something new and i realize that it starts with me. i start the change and that's not a problem. my environment just SUCKS and it truly makes the change ten times harder. being so close yet so far to what you want. but this is my last year. no more worries after this all. when i'm home and i don't have to come back to school, things are so much better. let me focus on that.

`sometimes i feel like my foot is constantly in my mouth. i just need to be quiet and let things do what they should right? i hate that i feel bad about certain things.

i guess i'll silently disappear. going in a cirle isn't what my intentions are. CHANGE is what's supposed to happen. and if you're not down with that, then i can't do it anymore. i'm sorry. i didn't come THIS far for people to get clammy and keep me out. my feelings are important. it's not just about you.

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